I am 42 years old, divorced, and with 2 kids I have been searching for happiness. I was on the verge of giving up, and I was just going to stay alone and lonely for the rest of my life.
I have been told to be pretty for my age, but when one’s heart is closed, happiness will stay away. I have tried dating services, been on many dates, and finally I came to realize that it was very possible that the problem lied within me, and not the men I was dating.
Naturally I would listen to everybody giving me advice, but I figured, that this was something I needed to resolve on my own. But how? I began reading books about love, and I started to understand why my life had turned out to be as it was. I finally realized that I should not be looking for faults in other people, my life was being created by me, alone. These were useful readings, the only thing I was still unsure of, though: How do I begin? I was ready to change my life, but I did not know how. And since there are no coincidences, my next book was about karma-removal, and that the source of my problems may have (also) come from previous lives.
I knew immediately that this was just what I needed. I could resolve the issues from my current life, but not the ones that were rooted in other lifetimes, especially if I didn’t even know about them. I signed up for a session through a friend of mine’s mom, and I was anxiously awaiting for the first therapy. This was almost exactly one year ago. We focused on many areas of my life. Firstly, we looked for causes in my current life, and I was discovering why things turned out as they did. My father was always acting superior to my mother, and this was a repeating family pattern. I had been carrying this imprint within me: a man could never respect a woman, women are the servants of men. I was only able to attract men of that nature, and I had always been expected to behave like that.
I had had a block in me since I was 16, and it was around the time of my first love. My first boyfriend cheated on me, made me feel unworthy, and just used me. I was made of the laughing-stock of the whole school. When these surfaced, we talked them through, I could let them go, and I then I was able to go back to previous lives. I asked to go back to a life which had had the most impact on this one, and to find out why my happiness was avoiding me.
I found myself in the 17th or 18th century Japan, where I worked as a Geiko (I had to look this up, and I found out that Geishas called themselves that). I lived in the country. I was not very bright, but I had to go to a very strict school. I played music, and sang, and felt awfully lonely. I was around 16, when I fell in love with one of the teachers of the school. He made me trust him by being caring, loving and kind, then when I could completely trust him, he betrayed me horribly. He and his friends raped and killed me. That was probably the reason that I was afraid of men, and I would only attract the ones with an aggressive nature. I was crying all night afterwards, and felt like I was removing the trauma from within me with a rage. The next morning I felt much better, like I was a new person. Many other therapy sessions followed. I saw different lives, and many other problems got resolved, but this caused the most impact. I truly believe now, that if you have karmic blocks inside you, it makes it impossible to progress in life unless you remove them first.
2 months after the therapy I met a guy, and we already got engaged. I let my soul mate into my life. We have never had a loud argument. I am so grateful that I have allowed him in. I also found out, that we had been lovers throughout many other lifetimes.
He came into my life again to show me what it feels like to be truly happy.
Thank you, Wiki, so much!!
Elizabeth - 42
